Warning: the effects of this pill are permanent!
I fidgeted with the pill container in my hand. The only detail on the plain white container besides the warning is a blue silhouette of a pony.
I’d heard whispers of a drug that can rapidly transform people into ponies, but I’d never seen anyone who’d actually used it, and I’d never been able to find any myself; why these pills had been delivered to my house or whether they were legit was a mystery to me.
I sat down to consider my situation. I was desperate to be a pony. To be covered in soft fur, to have a delightfully brushable mane, a perfectly boopable snoot and of course perky pony ears felt like a dream came true. But how would I explain this? Would becoming a pony hurt? Were these pills even legit?
I emptied the contents of the bottle into my palm: two substantial blue pills stamped with the same pony from the bottle and a folded piece of paper: “for best results take both pills”.
Pushing my fears out of my mind I put the first pill on my tongue and swallowed without even using any water and then did the same with the second pill.